my journal

The bees that live under our house are a PITA. We've left them alone for a couple of reasons: (1) nobody will come and deal with them for less than $4000, and then, they can't guarantee anything, and (2) bees. Plus the fact that it's actually helping the environment.

Yesterday, I couldn't even push my small electric mower, let alone run it, from 50 feet away from the bees. They were sending one or two after me. They're going to have to go, sadly. I can't have the yard growing up into a snake-den, living right next to the swamp like I do.

Distrust all claims for the one true way; there isn't one.

I tend to be open-minded and curious, skeptical of dogmatic beliefs or ideologies, and always willing to question the prevailing "wisdom".

Practice the Prime Directive; don't pry, judge, or imitate.

I try very hard to respect the autonomy and individuality of others. I've had to learn to suspend judgment, and it's really difficult for me not to ask people questions about their choices, but I manage it, somehow. Live and let live is really important to me, deep down.

Keep it simple; it's cheaper and easier to carry.

Simplicity is a guiding principle for me. I'm trying to minimize the complexity of my stuff and my daily routines. I'm working on trying to prioritize experiences and relationships.

Do one thing well; multitasking is a lie.

I try to practice deep work, to seek focus and depth, rather than trying to juggle multiple tasks simultaneously. You can do a lot about a lot of things by just giving them your full attention for 30 minutes a day. Mastery doesn't take 10,000 hours, because mastery is also a lie: You're just as good as you are at this moment; you'll never know everything or do it all.

Network; you were born to connect.

Human community is everything: collaboration, cooperation, exchange of ideas. We did not evolve to be loners, Batman not withstanding.

Say what you mean; nothing is truer than the truth.

Honesty and authenticity are paramount: Trust me, I've lived the other way, and it sucks every single minute of every single day. I don't even like quibbling, that is, obeying the letter of a statement, command, rule, or principle, while violating the spirit. I value integrity and honesty and expect the same from others; if I'm not willing to be your friend, this is probably why.

Be who you are; even a bent wire can carry a great light.

I accept that, basically, I'm from another planet. Everyone who live geniunely has something valuable to offer, regardless of which flaws or limitations happen to be theirs. It won't stop you from doing great and amazing things with your life.

Release early, release often; the Next Big Thing often isn’t.

Progress, not perfection; iteration and continuous improvement, not mastery. Start where you are, share what you have.

Use what you have; don’t dig for diamonds with a bar of gold.

Resourcefulness, practicality, and being prepared are essential to me.

Hack; we learn best by trial and error, with voltmeter in hand.

I believe we only learn by doing, that is, by screwing it up a couple of times until we develop the right habits. I also believe you can screw up in a controlled and safe environment, and you should pay attention to when you're really ready to take off the training wheels.

Leverage everything but people and their money; eschew bigger hammers.

I am an absolute fanatic for the ethical and respectful treatment of others. People should never be used or manipulated, especially not for personal gain. I prize empathy and compassion, and I can't stand people who don't act fairly.

Think ahead, but don’t worship your plans; use controlled chaos.

Yes, I am forward-thinking and proactive, and willing to jump out there, Still, no reason not to anticipate potential challenges and be prepared (hence the voltmeter). You can be comfortable with uncertainty and embrace spontaneity without being stupid, and that's what "think ahead" means.

Health

I view health as a holistic concept, encompassing physical, mental, and emotional well-being. I believe they are interconnected, so I am trying to maintain a balance between them. Self-care is important, as is eating when you're hungry, drinking when you're thirsty, and sleeping when you're sleepy -- and not doing these things just to be doing something, or because a clock or calendar tells you you should. I'm also not very big on processed foods, although I can binge on them from time to time.

I have trouble maintaining an active lifestyle. My joints are slow to move (always have been), so walking and standing require extra effort. I'm thinking of getting a bicycle, since I have successfully used one before to maintain my health better.

Friendships

I choose friends with intention. I value authenticity and seek genuine connections. I look for friends who align with my values, interests, and beliefs. I prioritize compatibility in terms of personality, communication styles, trust, honesty, mutual respect, and acceptance.

Chores

I try to find ways to keep my chores simple, without harming the environment. The fewer things you keep, the fewer chores you have. I try to streamline and simplify everything as much as possible, from grouping chores so I don't walk back and forth a lot, to getting rid of things that require a lot of maintainence but don't provide a lot of value. I try to keep things done, rather than letting them sit, though I do have my moments of procrastination; I'm working on it.

Finances

I try to approach money and finances with a mindset of prudence, simplicity, and mindful decision-making. It's important to be continuously and fully aware of my financial status, including spending, savings, and earnings. I clock my time, so that I give my employer full effort for the money paid; this means I don't even charge my company for my bathroom breaks. I am learning to avoid consumerism and unnecessary expenses, something I have found much easier since I abandoned social media and news sites a few months ago.

Today was quite a peculiar day, full of mixed-up plans and unexpected twists. I had initially taken a day off from work to be there for my wife, as she was supposed to undergo surgery yesterday. However, things took an unexpected turn, and her surgery got postponed until next week.

Given this sudden change of events, I found myself in a bit of a dilemma. Although I had planned to be by my wife's side, I realized that I couldn't afford to completely neglect my work responsibilities. You see, at my job, we operate on a two-week cycle, or what we call "pulses." And if I don't put in some effort today, tomorrow, and perhaps even on Saturday, I won't be able to meet my objectives for this week.

Now, I understand that others may not necessarily be deeply concerned about this situation, but it genuinely matters to me. I take pride in fulfilling my professional commitments and meeting the goals I set for myself. Therefore, despite the unexpected change in plans, I decided to dedicate some time today to work, ensuring that I stay on track and don't fall behind.

It's a strange feeling to take a day off and still end up doing work, but life often throws us these curveballs. And in the grand scheme of things, this minor hiccup is just a blip on the radar. What truly matters is that I maintain my focus, accomplish my tasks, and make progress towards my objectives.

Although it's disappointing that my wife's surgery had to be postponed, I know that her health and well-being come first. We'll adapt to this new schedule, and I'll continue to support her throughout this process. In the meantime, I'll stay determined and motivated, ensuring that I make the most out of this mixed-up day.

Today didn't turn out quite like I expected. The transfer of clearances, unfortunately, didn't happen yet, so Sharan's cataract surgery couldn't take place today. We're trying to figure it out.

In the meantime, I'm floating with no particular plans. Meh. Maybe I need to make some: nothing that can't be undone if the surgery can happen. Maybe I can make progress on stalled projects. Or maybe I can just sit here with the cat.

Somewhat significant Tuesday; tomorrow starts six-day long weekend that concludes with the Memorial Day holiday. Leisure and responsibility. Tomorrow, my wife is scheduled for cataract surgery, and I'll be there to support her while she can't see.

Plan to make the most of this break. In addition to caring for my wife, I have a long-overdue physical exam with my doctor scheduled for Friday. It's an important health step that I keep putting off.

Today started weird. Woke up feeling a congested, like I couldn't breathe properly. PulseO2 and thermometer assured me that I'm fine, just didn't sleep well. I usually sleep on a couch, since it fits better in my room. Sometimes, like last night, when I crash in position for 7-8 hours, I wake up sore, cranky, and congested. I'm quite sure it's related to my sinus issues and the impending rain. I can always sense it. I get a slight sore throat, or a discomfort in my left ear, or a feeling of pressure in my head -- any of which go away as soon as the rain starts to get heavy. Guess I'm a human barometer of sorts.

Addiction to diet drinks is getting a little better. It's been a case-a-day habit (think 12 cans). Barely finish one when I want another. What do they put in these things? Anyway, I've been ordering some alkaline water (9.x pH), and drinking that seems to cut the craving some. Not to mention adding just a little will power to the game. I hate being beholden to anything, even diet soda.

Today was a quieter day for me, as Sharan headed to a shower in Quitman for her niece-in-law. With the house to myself, I focused on my Sunday School teaching before returning home. Back at home, I dedicated some time to working on the ledger. After some contemplation, I made the decision to start afresh, recording current values and reclassifying credit cards as liabilities rather than assets.

In the midst of my tasks, Baby (the cat) showed her eagerness for some quality time together. We sat side by side as I indulged in watching two episodes of NCIS. Eventually, I gently insisted that she settle on my peace blanket on the couch. Initially, there were objections, but she eventually lay down and began napping, even after I got up. It seemed she found comfort in the arrangement. Taking advantage of the moment, I proceeded to organise my budget.

As I reviewed my finances, I realised that we really need to tighten up -- that is, if we want to maintain a budget and reach our other financial goals this year. However, I managed to allocate a good chunk to savings, avoid resorting to credit cards, and make adjustments to some of the extravagantly large budget items. Though progress was made, I acknowledged the need to continue working on the budget throughout the month, maintaining open communication with Sharan as we navigate the process together.

Overall, today brought moments of solitude, productivity, and connection, with a sense of responsibility towards our financial stability. As the month progresses, I remain committed to making the necessary adjustments and keeping our financial goals in sight.

Today, I attended D's memorial, a solemn occasion that allowed me to pay my respects and reflect on the impact he had on our lives. However, during the service, Father Harry used an analogy that I found rather unsettling and inappropriate. It centred around septic tanks and the concept of Jesus taking on our sins, which left me feeling uncomfortable.

In the midst of this emotional gathering, I had the opportunity to meet some individuals whom I hadn't yet had the chance to connect with. It was a pleasant surprise to engage in conversations with them and foster new connections during this difficult time.

Following the service, a compassionate community gathered to share in a meal together. The abundance of food and drink provided a comforting atmosphere, as we sought solace and support from one another. Wanting to contribute in my own way, I stayed behind to assist with the cleanup efforts. Being mindful not to disrupt those engaged in more physically demanding tasks, I focused on tasks along the periphery, ensuring I was helpful without being obtrusive.

Now, as I find myself back at home, I take solace in observing Baby joyfully frolicking outside, bringing a sense of lightness amidst the day's sombreness. Meanwhile, Sharan likely rests peacefully, finding comfort in slumber.

To enhance my productivity and minimise unnecessary disruptions, I made a practical decision to add tags like "sitting," "standing," "walking," and "driving" to my tasks. Although some may argue for the benefits of more frequent movement, I find this approach efficient, as it reduces the need for constant transitions and interruptions.

Overall, it has been a day of reflection, appreciation, and the navigation of emotions amidst a community coming together to honour and remember a cherished individual.